At night when i was hugging Snowie to sleep, i think of many facts that will soon happen. I heard news from my mom that my uncle's german shephard passed away. He's only 10. that's pretty young for a dog to die - my opinion.
I loved every thing about my snowie. no one can replace her. i get her to sleep with me even i get back pain for squeezing in a single size bed. This morning i suddenly imagined her day to come. I thought i could be strong. very rational. able to accept that she will go sooner than i am. then i think deeper. imagine it. i couldn't smell her no more. i can't carry her, touch her, kiss her goodnight.
That feeling sucks. i start to tears with my cheek leaning to her butt. some day i don't get a welcome face, or innocent look, and i wont be looking for her when i don't see her.
more tears drop on her butt..i start to stop myself from thinking that far. every time i try to hold myself from being so depress so that i won't affect her. i guess what i can do is appreciate every moment with her now ;) i do hope she can live long enough to see my children :)
Love,
Yi
19/02/2013