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Monday, August 30, 2010

Snowie & I; we cut them off


just brought snowie to hair cut nope! its fur cut.. lol its her first time. if its not because of fleas. i won't bring her to cut off the fur.

i dropped her at the shop and go off to the vet but its closed. so came back. when i see her. i'm surprise to see that she's still pretty in short fur. she looks so cute. and also, thin. hahah but i like her like this. very fresh. looks younger.

two days before, i too, cut my hair short. without any hesitation. i felt very much sadness and stressness and pressure on my shoulder and i just feel cut it all off. cut away the depressness. actually i dont even wanna care if i look ugly. but it didn't turn out so bad. i salute the hairstylist. no one wants to cut a short hair for me. hahah

i bought snowie a new collar. red and bigger than the one before. love it. she look like another breed now. some say she look like male dog. hmm..i dint disagree that lol. lin came home and waaahhhhhhhh , surprise for some time. hahaha still hard to believe she cut her fur off. she said she is like a "sexy model cut her hair to turn herself into tomboy look". hmmm...agree too hahah

if she didn't go grooming i wont know her head is that big.

heyya, here's song i listen to today. Folk song babe!!!!!! :D wants to relax. for tomorrow i will be going back to college for editing. on merdeka day. which means, i will be alone in whole college again. rock on...


Metal

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Thursday, August 26, 2010

Fear. Frighten. Phobia.

it was an unlucky day i guess. really bad day for me. the whole night at college. the tragedy. is linked.

5sumthing - First it was "misunderstood" of message between lecturer and student. this lect said that lock the editing room and get keys from 5th floor. in the message i receive, i thought it's lock the edit room, and get they keys when i'm back at 7pm. i purposely ran up to lock the door when i was at the basement. about to go dinner with lin. so i guess the whole thing happened there.

7sumthing - when i'm back from dinner. i find that 5th floor is close. i tried the other stairs to get to 5th floor. but they are all locked. i call and notice that what he was saying is get key from him immediately after i lock the door. is it his way of giving message not right? or the way i receive message not right? okay! i fucked up. does that mean i don't get to edit that night? no, i have a feeling that i will sit inside the edit room and send msg to close fren and said "you know what happened to me just now?"

then my lect asked me to TRY TO get in 5th floor and TRY TO get keys from his desk. but i can't reach anyone in there. how am i suppose to? i go to ground floor. try the guards instead. the guard sees a VIP mercerdes came in school. "grab his shoes to clean it". invite him into the guard house and totally ignored me. i keep approach. they don't even know what to say and i figure later that they dun even have the key! and they are asking me to WAIT! i waited a while. then left.

go back to 7th floor to try the door again. maybe it's not lock? hell no.it IS lock! i wondered around 7th floor to see if i can meet someone. then suddenly. out of no where. there's sound of footstep. probly is a "she" cause its a heel footstep.i listen then run towards the direction of the footstep. no one. then i get into the toilet to check. no one. i get to the reception to see. no one. then i walk around each class room to find that person. no one.

so i waited at 7th floor's lift. i know that. theres only two way out. and the footstep is definitely at this direction. i wait till the person appear. no one. i feel miserable that i can't edit. instead, im walking around 7th floor. i find that 7th floor creeps to me.maybe because im alone.

then back to ground floor. i guess, god already set up everything? i took a rest and saw a staff/lect i hate the most past by. approach. how funny is it? the person that i hate, is the person that saved me.

8sumthing - finally got the key. but i can't open the fucking door. it takes quite some time. till i sweat, till i smells awefull. then i get to open. ok, now i'm typing message to my fren and lin. saying " you won't believe what happen to me just now".

and then i start my work. on the way of progression. i keep receiving message from my lect. why is he bugging me? i thought. i ignored most of the message. then the second last message he sent me. about camera lost thing. i replied him after an hour. his reply really pissed me off. saying that 5% marks will be deducted of my dumb work. wat's dumb work? i shock. after tht he wrote no food in edit room. cctv is monitored by him. he was talking about the day before. my fren, lin and i were eating in the room. so the editing room IS under surveillance? i don't fucking care!

a lecturer can send such message to a student. what i call him? i fucking failure. everytime he send a message, he didn't use the brain to think. will this message be too harsh for a student? i guess he don't give a damn about it. i was pissed. i feel going home right away.

10something - i need a toilet. i open up the editing room door. gosh! dark dark dark. then i close it back. thinking of going later. or maybe when i go home.

11sumthing - while editing. i feel messaging my sister to come escort me home. but i didn't. thinking that its just college. dont want to trouble my sister.

12sumthing - still editing but about to go home.

12sumthing, turning 1pm - finished certain part. pack to go. grab everything and open the door. stunned for a while. quite dark. then look at the aisle. can't see a thing. then i off the edit room's light. and quickly on it back on. after i off it. i can't see anything. took out my mobile. light is weak. but i'll have to move. quickly lock then follow the other way to the lift. very dark this time.

the barrel is pulled down. i pull it up. quite heavy cuz i only have one hand to pull it. so stupid to pull it back down when i pass. the lift are all not working. then pull it back up. it took some time to pull the thing up. i DO imagine a person standing with me tries to hurt me or something but just a while.

i then take the stair. i'm in fear. i really need the toilet. i can feel pain in the stomach. i start to shake when i walk down the stairs. the lower i get to the scarier i feel. until i reach 3rd floor. i saw that below first floor the lights are not on. all off. so i try the door at 3rd floor. can't open. i got panic. feel more want to pee.slowly getting down to 2nd floor. door not open. then the way to 1st floor is really really dark. i am still feeling scare when i write this. i need to walk very very slow to feel the ground so that i won't fall. when i get to open the door. the kind of feeling. is a feeling that i can't express. still scare but more relief at least im not stuck in stair part.

1sumthing - i'm shaking badly when i got in the car. when i reach home i was pissed to see the parking place in house is taken by myvi. feel angry that why didn't they care bout my life? same goes to the wooden door. locked. i feel the same too.

1sumthing - i told lin everything. she asked me why din't i call her to accompany. and she is more shock about the message. then i realise, i'm frighten.

i tried to lock the car with the gate remote control. and when i light the candle to pray, after pray i almost put the candle back in the drawer. im surprise myself. i almost take the beg i upstair.

actually im suppose to go back today. but i didn't want to.

i also had nightmares this morning. the scene is at my room and my house aisle. but the same incident that happened at school. i am so scare to even think of 7th floor now. writing this post is bringing me back the memories and makes me shake a little. maybe i might look like a "baby" to some people, maybe you might think its a small case. but it comes from the bottom of the heart. it's just like that. well that is it..lifetime...everyone is different...



MetalYi

Saturday, August 21, 2010

This Week..i......

oh i dreamed a dream.. < (ok this is so lame yet i still feel using it ) it was in the afternoon. i laugh so hard in my dream. those that i can't stop laughing. but the dream was simple. just few scene with many people in it. and all the comedian star like stephen chow etc... also those people around like yoyo and her family, my family, jeffrey too, and klee too if im not mistake. so many people. so crowded. i laugh so hard. i can feel myself laughing in real too. and it last for quite long. but i dont get it what so funny when i woke up :D
back to my real life. there's a cold war. quite serious i think. cuz i feel really cold xD ok that's a stupid joke. sick with them cold war so often? hmm..nah..sometimes, when you're living in a middle of a war country. you just can't say i'm sick of it i need to leave. it's that, you can't leave the place. you have to get used to it instead of leaving the place. war war war...it's just the matter of time isn't it? we innocent people will have to watch how bad the war goes. and hope, that the as the time pass. things will get better.

i've been really relax in this week. right after the interview, i did nothing. i relax for the whole week. watching movies and game and sleep and wake in the afternoon. days pass by, and i wonder, did i miss something? that i didn't do? god, wake me..

about the movies i watched. i feel i almost touch the people in the movies. i've been watching great movies like The Green Mile, Splice(just fine), Mystic River, Remember the Titans, Thin red line (not good for me >.<), and The Experiment (x good too). most of the movies have Adrien Brody and Sean Penn in it =.= cause i kinda fell in love with them.
The green mile. i cried so badly. started crying half way of the movie. then gotten worst in the end. after the movie end. when i pray, i feel crying. then when i go upstair. i cried a while in my bed. damn! it's fucking sad. maybe its because of the green mile, the next day when i watch mystic river, i feel sad for a guy in the movie. sigh.....

tonight i will watch another. and those are things i do in this week. shall start editing soon..

Metal Yi

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The Experiment
Splice - sarah polley and adrien brody

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Everyone have their FIRST TIME

my first time of accident. i banged the pillar when i reverse. i was so worried yesterday on the way to kl. thought i might bang someone. sarcastically, it's today, at my own home. god blessed me :D

my brother and i are both in the car. i was rushing to bring him to tuition and to fetch my sister from college. so i didn't go slow when i reverse. weird thing is, when i bang the wall, its so loud. yet me and my brother got no worries for that. remain so damn calm.

the reason that i'm not worry at all is because everyone have their first time ain't i right? and this is my first time. just that, my first time is with Avanza >.<

i didn't check the car after the damage. i got the car away from wall then reverse again. but i do lost some confident after that. i told my brother so. and he say he feel dangerous. hahah i'm still very curious about the car. i feel that it will be very worst cause i really heard loud bang. but i can't see thru side mirror. Fine! Give up!

i was reacting good. very ok all the way. and about to fetch my sis from college then go for a bubble tea. my sis, acting real impatient. keep messaging and calling then msg me saying that she's angry. lol i don't know..i really don't know how should i think about this. she's waiting at college, im waiting in the jam. shouldn.t i be the one who's more impatient? i shud be the one that angry.

i try to relax. not to get moody. well, i did get angry for few minutes :P i know that..100% she forgot that my phone got no credits. can't call can't reply. that's why she get mad. i understand. i HAVE TO understand.

on the way to bubble tea. i told her im angry. she told me shes angry too. then our angry matter ends there. i hope? :D

i was surprise to find that she enter the car with the "normal" face. i asked about the car. she didn't know that i damaged the car. HAHAH! i guess it's not that serious?

honestly i think its not as serious as what i thought. now there's white paint on the car. and abit...really abit! of damage. but according to my mom. she think its very serious. well, still i will say. EVERYONE HAVE THEIR FIRST TIME :D


Tuesday, August 10, 2010

A travel Back To the Past, Feel the History - July Penang War Museum



ahh since i cant sleep, here's a post for the penang trip on July. i was sooooooooo lazy to even write it in a blog.

honestly i had so much fun during the trip. it feels "screw all the stress and assignment" :P

today i'll post the most interesting/my favourite place of all. the war museum. it's a big surprise for me. well i guess us.. i expect the war museum to be in an air-conditioner space.

before we enter, the person gave us a really "fast" introduction about the place. i like it when he say "after you cross the border line, you'll get younger and younger. back to malaya". Cool!

so three of us step across the border line. hmm..din't feel younger :P but i do feel the atmosphere back at WWII.

i look into the place so detail that i always be the one left behind. it happens in every museum =.= i guess i'm just slow. the three of us, yoyo, lin and i. so curious about the tunnel that we heard from yoyo's sister. can't wait for that. Finally reached the tunnel part. COOOOOOOLLLLLL!!!!!

real small space, but i like it. three of us took a torch and......here's another story. two of my lovely ji mui says that they don't want to be the first. i be the hero then LOL! i hold the torch, bring them in the tunnel. lin pull my shirt, yo pull her shirt. i try to walk slow, want to feel everything the soldier felt.

THEN! hahaha, i turn back to see them as i already hear chaos in my ji muis. saying things like scary/yerr.. but the best moment that i will ALWAYS REMEBER. is Yoyo's face. she looks really panic when i see her with the light. real panic. but i didn't know that they are really that scare. yoyo wants to be in front. and i dun mind to swtich. but lin, at that moment, block yoyo, and yoyo keeeeeeeeep squeeze.

i cant believe this chaos actually happen in a small tunnel =.= lin was pushing me as well. chaos till we didn't realize we're already out of the tunnel. my god! my ji muis ...

then another remarkable moment. is when we have to climb in a small space escape route. yoyo is the first to climb in and said "you gotta be kidding me". made me lol! this space is even smaller than the previous tunnel.

you see, i just had my hair cut, try to keep my hair on form. BUT! after all the climbing~ my hair has already stick together from the sweat. arh..dam..avoid camera! LoL


Still, we had so much fun. The kids really missed this!

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Thursday, August 5, 2010

Critical STRIKE!

Been real busy lately. well, two subject, i mean two hardest subject. wat to do? have to go on. im so not ready to do it. that is why i got no confident at all. and keep thinking im gonna fail. especially 4 times of story reject. makes me feel so nervous evertime i pass the idea for approval.

just hand up a script. got no response from him yet. not sure why. i told myself to accept it every time he reject. but still, i feel so scare today when the message tone ring. dam myself!

well, i couldn't waste another time sitting at home doing nothing. so i do planning for documentary today. did lots of research and watched documentary. even i think its boring. :P

WELL! at this moment, this critical moment. my dad hand me a letter. saying it's from SEGi. i took it over and throw aside. totally ignored it. but i heard my dad reading a letter to me from segi. saying that i fail to......(not so clear cuz i ignored it) but when i heard the word fail, man it scares me. i was thinking, i haven't take final yet why already sent me letter?

okay okay, here it is..at this MOST CRITICAL moment, segi sent a letter, oh, URGENT letter regarding the deferment of music Final Performance. i.......swt....=.=" why the hell..at this time? and to my DAD as well.
my dad continue reading. when i know its about music, i ignored it :P

afterthat i read myself, hmm..they wants me to take the final in one year time from the time i defer. and they want me to give them answer on 9th August. dammit! i have no time for this o'right! i tried not to let that letter affect my mood.

im still good now. just that, i don't know what will happen next. we'll see.

Metal