Fear. Frighten. Phobia.

it was an unlucky day i guess. really bad day for me. the whole night at college. the tragedy. is linked.

5sumthing - First it was "misunderstood" of message between lecturer and student. this lect said that lock the editing room and get keys from 5th floor. in the message i receive, i thought it's lock the edit room, and get they keys when i'm back at 7pm. i purposely ran up to lock the door when i was at the basement. about to go dinner with lin. so i guess the whole thing happened there.

7sumthing - when i'm back from dinner. i find that 5th floor is close. i tried the other stairs to get to 5th floor. but they are all locked. i call and notice that what he was saying is get key from him immediately after i lock the door. is it his way of giving message not right? or the way i receive message not right? okay! i fucked up. does that mean i don't get to edit that night? no, i have a feeling that i will sit inside the edit room and send msg to close fren and said "you know what happened to me just now?"

then my lect asked me to TRY TO get in 5th floor and TRY TO get keys from his desk. but i can't reach anyone in there. how am i suppose to? i go to ground floor. try the guards instead. the guard sees a VIP mercerdes came in school. "grab his shoes to clean it". invite him into the guard house and totally ignored me. i keep approach. they don't even know what to say and i figure later that they dun even have the key! and they are asking me to WAIT! i waited a while. then left.

go back to 7th floor to try the door again. maybe it's not lock? hell no.it IS lock! i wondered around 7th floor to see if i can meet someone. then suddenly. out of no where. there's sound of footstep. probly is a "she" cause its a heel footstep.i listen then run towards the direction of the footstep. no one. then i get into the toilet to check. no one. i get to the reception to see. no one. then i walk around each class room to find that person. no one.

so i waited at 7th floor's lift. i know that. theres only two way out. and the footstep is definitely at this direction. i wait till the person appear. no one. i feel miserable that i can't edit. instead, im walking around 7th floor. i find that 7th floor creeps to me.maybe because im alone.

then back to ground floor. i guess, god already set up everything? i took a rest and saw a staff/lect i hate the most past by. approach. how funny is it? the person that i hate, is the person that saved me.

8sumthing - finally got the key. but i can't open the fucking door. it takes quite some time. till i sweat, till i smells awefull. then i get to open. ok, now i'm typing message to my fren and lin. saying " you won't believe what happen to me just now".

and then i start my work. on the way of progression. i keep receiving message from my lect. why is he bugging me? i thought. i ignored most of the message. then the second last message he sent me. about camera lost thing. i replied him after an hour. his reply really pissed me off. saying that 5% marks will be deducted of my dumb work. wat's dumb work? i shock. after tht he wrote no food in edit room. cctv is monitored by him. he was talking about the day before. my fren, lin and i were eating in the room. so the editing room IS under surveillance? i don't fucking care!

a lecturer can send such message to a student. what i call him? i fucking failure. everytime he send a message, he didn't use the brain to think. will this message be too harsh for a student? i guess he don't give a damn about it. i was pissed. i feel going home right away.

10something - i need a toilet. i open up the editing room door. gosh! dark dark dark. then i close it back. thinking of going later. or maybe when i go home.

11sumthing - while editing. i feel messaging my sister to come escort me home. but i didn't. thinking that its just college. dont want to trouble my sister.

12sumthing - still editing but about to go home.

12sumthing, turning 1pm - finished certain part. pack to go. grab everything and open the door. stunned for a while. quite dark. then look at the aisle. can't see a thing. then i off the edit room's light. and quickly on it back on. after i off it. i can't see anything. took out my mobile. light is weak. but i'll have to move. quickly lock then follow the other way to the lift. very dark this time.

the barrel is pulled down. i pull it up. quite heavy cuz i only have one hand to pull it. so stupid to pull it back down when i pass. the lift are all not working. then pull it back up. it took some time to pull the thing up. i DO imagine a person standing with me tries to hurt me or something but just a while.

i then take the stair. i'm in fear. i really need the toilet. i can feel pain in the stomach. i start to shake when i walk down the stairs. the lower i get to the scarier i feel. until i reach 3rd floor. i saw that below first floor the lights are not on. all off. so i try the door at 3rd floor. can't open. i got panic. feel more want to pee.slowly getting down to 2nd floor. door not open. then the way to 1st floor is really really dark. i am still feeling scare when i write this. i need to walk very very slow to feel the ground so that i won't fall. when i get to open the door. the kind of feeling. is a feeling that i can't express. still scare but more relief at least im not stuck in stair part.

1sumthing - i'm shaking badly when i got in the car. when i reach home i was pissed to see the parking place in house is taken by myvi. feel angry that why didn't they care bout my life? same goes to the wooden door. locked. i feel the same too.

1sumthing - i told lin everything. she asked me why din't i call her to accompany. and she is more shock about the message. then i realise, i'm frighten.

i tried to lock the car with the gate remote control. and when i light the candle to pray, after pray i almost put the candle back in the drawer. im surprise myself. i almost take the beg i upstair.

actually im suppose to go back today. but i didn't want to.

i also had nightmares this morning. the scene is at my room and my house aisle. but the same incident that happened at school. i am so scare to even think of 7th floor now. writing this post is bringing me back the memories and makes me shake a little. maybe i might look like a "baby" to some people, maybe you might think its a small case. but it comes from the bottom of the heart. it's just like that. well that is it..lifetime...everyone is different...



MetalYi