what was it like?when we used to be?

4th day after break up...

trying to be like days where we used to be?like the closest friend ever??

think harder, we used to be like closest friend? we flirt alot..i was in love with him..he doesn't know that..

so how could we be like that now??

it would be better if we don't talk..after i talked to him...i feel bad every night..

i couldn't imagine what it will be like if i see him standing in front of me..

4th day after break up...
i feel so uneasy. it feels so bad to hurt a person. especially a person u don't wanna hurt.

i know how its like now.

and if i get to choose, i rather be the one to get hurt, then me hurting the person.

i was thinking, maybe im thinking too much. perhaps he's ok now? maybe watching tv, having fun, or sleeping well.

while i..stupidly thinks that i hurt him?


4th day after break up...it feels like its just yesterday..

i want everything good..

i was suppose to be doing my paperwork now..but i only done the first page. which is only 2 paragraph.

im feeling so worry..why is that?i hate that..

im blogging here..im not suppose to blog..my mind is so blank after my last conversation with him..

im fucked..

heart and the brain, they are enemies. they never goes the same way. dont u think human, normally follow the brain?

i'm not sure about that. but at the moment, i hate my heart, and at the same time, my brain, too..

i start to lost my mind already. it needed time to find back my way. my heart? i feel it..hard..it won't get numb this few days..it just keep bugging me...

MetalYi